Discomfort – Author Brenda-Lee Ranta

 

I was never comfortable

in my own skin

always fitting like

the wrong size

Entering a room filled

with people, sure they

sensed my discomfiture,

my mind frantically

seeking the corner

to be inconspicuous,

hidden far away

 

I smiled

I feigned indifference

I feigned self-assurance

I feigned attractiveness

 

I was sure they could

see through me

like a counterfeit bill,

hot off the press,

a little too crisp,

a little too new, as

transparent as a sheet

of cellophane, my false

bravado left me feeling

phony, on more reason

to self deprecate

 

I cried

hiding my fear

hiding insecurity

hiding ineptitude

 

Questioning why it

has always been

as far back as I can

recall, this is my reality

Morphing into something

like terror, immobilizing

my ability to perform tasks

People frightened me,

at the bank, at the grocery

store, at the drive through,

at my front door

 

I died

inside a little

renewed a little

healed a little

 

loved myself

just a little

 

 © Brenda-Lee Ranta

myriad-of-perceptions

Excerpt from the book “Myriad of Perceptions”


brenda About the Author

Brenda-Lee Ranta resides in a small mining town, in Timmins, Ontario, Canada.  She has been employed with her local Police Service for 19 years. She shares her journey with her life partner, who is a musician, poet and lyricist; their rescue dog, Jake and rascal cat Fritz. She is the mother of three children, two step-children and three grandchildren.  They are her greatest pride and joy.

 Always moved by poetry and prose, she has been most inspired by the works of Leonard Cohen, an amazing Canadian word-smith. This is her first book containing a cross section of her works.

 Visit Brenda-Lee’s Author Page At: www.ctupublishinggroup.com/brenda-lee-ranta-.html



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1 reply

  1. Reblogged this on The Lyrical Journal and commented:
    an excerpt from my book..

    Like

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